A friend of mine told me about the power of the list. And you know what, I’m now a self confessed list-master. I reckon that the power of ‘The List’ is severely underrated, and we merely scrape the surface with a mish-mash shopping list on an old coffee-stained bank envelope. But I think that The List deserves a lot more credit.
Making a list (or Listing as I’m technically untechnically going to call it), can help you achieve all manner of goals. My list today consists of pretty mundane tasks. Banking, check. Buy new jeans, check. Supermarket shopping, check. But I’m thinking of spicing it up a little with some loud cackling, procrastinating, and some secret perving. The sense of accomplishment when ticking those babies off your list on completion gives you an instant high…. a listgasm if you will.
But, there is the potential to encounter a slight danger when listing – overlisting, which can lead to Listeria. You don’t ever want to become listeric. Open your eyes, check. Get out of bed, check. Walk to the bathroom, check. Trip over 1000 year old family cat on the way to the bathroom and curse loudly, check. Remember there are impressionable children in the house who are part-time parrots, check. Curse louder for cursing loudly in the first place, check. Once you become listeric, it’s hard to get out.
In the market for making a list? Well, today’s your lucky day. I have listing down to a fine art.
First, take a clean piece of paper, lined or blank. Take a black or blue pen. Write a title at the top of the page super carefully (preferably capitalised or underlined). Then, write your list. Extreme Listers like myself, perfect the list by making little check boxes at the start of each task. But it’s important not to rush that part. You want perfectly formed circles or squares, not polygons tripping on LSD. Then, when a task is complete, get a red pen and tick that box. Or if you’re an Extreme Lister, tick the box and cross out the task.
Some people get a little bit excited over finishing a task, and that leads to a form of Listeria. They start with a one-lined cross out. Then another line with a little bit of scribbling. Then in a fit of Listeric fury, they’ve cut right through the paper and made marks all over the desk.
Once you’ve ticked all of your boxes on a whole list, reached a listgasmic state, have a post-coital screwing up of the paper and biffing in the bin. Ahhhh, now you can sit down and get onto the next list….