Some blue Speedos on a bald man with gut strolled down to the breakers, and interrupted my train of thought.
“They should be illegal,” mused the next umbrella over.
A wave broke over his shiny head. Hope he’s put sunscreen on.
He reaches under his protruding puku and pulls the drawstrings tight. God forbid, the testicles escape. I’m wondering what’s the point? But I guess if a chick can reveal her shape in an itsy bitsy string bikini, why can’t mid-life crisis guy in his own mankini?
He carries on up the beach, back to his spot. I see people shudder, or maybe it’s just the heat waves creating squiggly line effects.
Mankini walks past and parks up 10 metres away. He sunbathes in his Smurf-coloured man bits coverer. Help.
Finally he puts on bold floral patterned shirt, and wanders off. Out of sight, out of mind.