It’s hard not to notice the new summer trend, cars plastered with a stickered sign screaming out ‘For Sale’. But my little cupcakes don’t be fooled into thinking the car is actually for sale… It’s the people inside.
I put two and two together a few summers ago when I was walking down through the Mount shops, to meet up for dinner with some old school friends. A blue rotary bom bommed past me, in record slow speed. The back window announced ‘For Sale 021 555 555’. Inside, young long blonde hair shimmered in the breeze. Outside, male heads turned and gawked. Some of them even stopped and did a complete 180 degree neck crane accompanied with body turn. Ahhh, I get it now. In a bid for desperate attention, you want to add the 1001st contact to your phone directory.
Ever since my eureka moment, more and more cars have appeared to have jumped on the bandwagon. Anything goes, from hot pink to a hand-written sign. No specs, no need to. What you see is what you get.
On New Year’s Day the sun was shining, everybody ever appeared to be at the beach, and my head was banging. I was hanging out in an apartment, watching the scene below with some friends. A car snailed past, full of over-testorised teens with LOUD music pumping. It had a ‘For Sale’ sign smiling across the back. The driver was bopping his head, using one hand to steer, and the other hand to point at people and sing in a try-hard ghetto kind of way. As we looked down, we came to a mutual agreement that it would be quite fun to text ‘ur a dick’.
We didn’t text because we were being too mature and were thinking of the repercussions. Maybe they will hunt us down and spring an ambush attack. But I really think it was the fact that the previous nights consumption of masses amount of wine had rendered me with sloth-like stealth abilities that day.
It makes me a little bit glad that I didn’t have to deal with the over-zealous selling yourself culture of teens today. All I had was a cell phone the size of a shoebox, with no text capabilities. It made my friends call me a ‘yuppie’. Although I am concerned that if I was 17 right now, I might actually have my car kitted out with a ‘For Sale’ sign. Maybe I’d be classy and write it in French.
So you youth, we know what you’re up to. It just gives us sophisticated ones another chance to shake our heads and be happy that our brains our fully developed. We do sometimes realise that we also had similar dick-like qualities at your age. But thank god we aren’t advertising our cars for sale.