I was in a state of unpacking disarray. You know the kind, where you open a few boxes, empty the entire contents across your whole floor and then stand around for 23 minutes staring at it and wondering what the heck you’re going to do with all of this crap stuff that you cannot throw away because it’s sentimental. And then you need a break from the not thinking, staring, pacing, umming & arrring.
I grabbed a slice of Christmas cake and looked down at ribbons I’d won at Calf Club twenty one years ago, a hair tie from my childhood, even an ugly Lego elephant that I’d got from a Kindy Santa present in England, when I was 3. I hated it because I had a super cool toy and some boy took it from my hand and swapped it without consulting me. I was distraught and have been carrying around that piece of devastation for nearly three decades. It sits in a box next to some of my baby teeth which I thought I was cleverly hoarding in order to bank them in together to give the tooth fairy for a bigger cash prize (I’d seen how inflation worked when my brother was scoring dollars and I’d only been gifted 20 & 50 cent pieces).
Then I found them in a dusty old Johnnie Walker box – a stack of 6 diaries from my youth. They ranged from the beginner’s ’93 Dinky Diary and Beverly Hills 90210 gems, to a ’97 Girlfriend diary packed with ‘babes’, to a non-descript sticker covered Collins daily planner. The contents is a melting pot of cringe-inducing and hilarious accounts of my daily milestones; staying up until midnight at sleepovers, playing games, an annoying brother, boy crushes that I was going to be in love with forever. But throughout those years, there was one constant – My diary entries have never lasted longer than March. I was never any good at sticking things out, so I’m surprised that I’ve been writing this blog for over 3 years now!
In the back of one diary was a real treat. My New Year’s Resolutions from December 27th 1996 (I was 15):
Stop getting annoyed so much.
Stop annoying people so much.
Get out and be adventurous.
Save some money.
Stop crossing my legs.
Have no regrets.
Drink more water!!!!
Enter more competitions.
Stop having so many resolutions that I will never get around to be bothered (hilariously, this is actually where that sentence ended).
Stop criticising people.
Once again, I think those resolutions had been good intentions. There’s no way that I saved an ounce of money or started karate. So looking back and taking a leaf out of what appears to be quite a mature mid-teen, I’m making some good intentions for the year. I feel that resolution comes peppered with a connotation of….. din, din, dinnnnnn….. failure. But this year I’m starting with great ideas and dreams and schemes!
What are your good intentions this year?